#2: Doing Something That One Does Not Want To Do In Relation To Another


You live in an apartment surrounded by others, and are aware your neighbor is lonely. They don’t enjoy their work, and haven’t mentioned any hobbies they have. Once, your neighbour came over (when you first moved in) for a drink and welcome. However, this tradition of coming over for a drink has continued. You don’t organise any official time but you know at least once a week there’ll be a knock on the door, an asking of how your week has been, and a look of loneliness. You, of course, invite them in. You don’t enjoy these times; your free time is precious, and the converation is often a little depressing. You wish to put an end to the regularity of these meetings. How can you be clean in your communication?

Between Friends

A friend offers to take you to a movie. However, they have suggested one that doesn’t really appeal to you. Instead you would much rather watch a different film, showing at a similar time. But, you are nice, so go along and sit through a boring 90 minutes, regretting that you hadn’t mentioned anything earlier. How could you have been clean in your communication?

Friendship Circle

You’re with a group of friends. It is Friday night and you are all having a few drinks. It’s getting late, and your friends wish to move on to a club, dancing until the early hours. They are fiercely encouraging you to join them. It is a new group of friends, so you regretably tag along, wishing instead you were ending the evening, and heading home. How can you be clean in your communication?

Marriage Partner

Your partner has organized Christmas this year and is having her parents stay over for the week. While you get on well with your in-laws, you really wanted to go and see them for a day (or two) but spend a quiet Christmas with your partner, perhaps even going away. You don’t mention anything, and move through Christmas wishing you were somewhere else. How could you have been clean in your communication?

The Workplace

When applying for your job, you expressed how much you have previously enjoyed opportunities to travel. Your boss has therefore asked if you would be willing to visit the companies other office across the country. You go, you enjoy the experience, and the trip is a sucess. However, since this first trip, your boss has now expected that you go on similar trips each quarter. While the fist trip was enjoyable, this novelty has worn off, and you really don’t wish to keep traveling so frequently. This agreement wasn’t in your initial contract, but but the business is doing well and you fear causing waves for the business and yourself in the future. How can you be clean in your communication?

Church, Community, Volunteer Organization

You helped raise the most money for your local charity this year. Therefore, you have been asked to make a little speech at the next event, and will be presented with a certicate of your achivements. Feeling obligated you begin preparing your speech, instead wishing this didn’t have to be done. You don’t enjoy public speaking, and don’t wish to be put in limelight. You like raising money for the cause, not for the recognition. How can you be clean in your communication?